Self Help Junkies

Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking - A Review

2007-02-06T13:13:00.000-07:00

Blink, ah, the review's over. No, seriously, there's more to say about this fun, well written, and insightful book than can fit in the blink of an eye. I found it to be another one of those books I want to last for awhile, but it was just too captivating to put down. Gladwell uses great anecdotes and enticing studies, from food and drink taste tests to military strategy games, to illustrate the powerful influence that our unconscious minds have on our decisions.

Blink is billed as pushing to get us to think less and act more on instinct, which seems to run contrary to what this world needs at this point in time. In fact, I found a book by the title of "Think: Why Crucial Decisions Can't Be Made in the Blink of an Eye" on the shelf very near Blink. "Think" appears to be a book written as a negative response to Gladwell's idea that decisions should often be made in the blink of an eye.

I would have tended to agree with that response before reading Blink. As a self-help junkie who knows through experience that the more valid information a person has the more likely the person is to act on making change, at first glance, it seemed a stretch to believe that more information and analysis could be trouble. But, Gladwell makes a well reasoned point about how in many, but not all situations, thinking too much and using too much information gets in the way of our making the best decisions. And, fortunately, he was also careful to balance out his discussion with more than a mere mention of how our snap decisions can often be very bad due to what lies in our unconscious minds.

What you'll get from this entertaining read beyond a little fun is an understanding of how training and mastery through experience benefits us. Gladwell doesn't promote that we should run out and make more snap decisions on everything in our lives, but rather he tells us that when we have a broad range of experiences in a particular area we end up with the ability to make strong, accurate, and quick intuitive decisions. And, on the other hand, the book acknowledges that when we have shallow prior knowledge and experiences in an area, we are often handicapped by our biases. That's the gotchya.

Although Gladwell leaves it up to us to discover what this all means in our own lives, I relate it to my experiences in the Martial Arts. Everyone who sticks with a martial art for awhile learns that disciplined training leads to quicker, cooler, and defter responses. There’s another more subtle point reflected in Blink and that can be learned through martial arts. That is that when you are well trained in situations that require quick responses, you know that it's better to avoid those kinds of situations when possible so that they have no chance of escalating and leading to disaster. Blink reinforces these tenets and inspires us to become experts in whatever arenas we choose in life so that we can use our expertise wisely and to our benefit.

I rate Blink a Four Star Experience:

Make a You-Turn: "You on a Diet: The Owner's Manual for Waist Management"

2007-01-18T12:54:00.000-07:00

My Mom saw Dr. Roizen on Oprah and decided to buy the book for me. I'm glad she did. When the authors used the phrase "owner's manual" in the title they named the book appropriately. "You on a Diet" is an essential book for anyone's library self. It contains a wealth of good information about how our bodies work. And, unlike some books that discuss the details of digestion, this book is written in a playful style that helps take the dryness out of the discussion.

I was especially impressed by the sections on addictive and emotional eating. "You on a Diet" explains the vicious cycle of eating junk for self-medication in a way that brings it home for the reader without creating a sense of shame for the food junkie. And, speaking of shame, according to "You on a Diet" that's #2 on the short list of emotional diet traps. The first is guilt. Few books about eating habits address this truth as directly and as well.

At times while I was reading, I thought perhaps that the book seemed a little light in the area of "what to eat" while very heavy on the "how it all works." But, as if the authors had premeditated my concern, the final chapter of the book addresses it. The book has a "starter" food plan to get us going, but Roizen and Oz tell us that their book is meant to be used as a companion to one of the many great food plans that are already on the market.

If you want more knowledge to help you succeed in making a "You-turn" toward a healthier you, this book is a must read. This book will give you a boost in understanding how to win at the food game and a cute mantra or two to carry with you on your journey toward eating well.

I rate "You on a Diet" a 4 star book.

The Perricone Prescription

2007-01-11T14:09:00.000-07:00

I've had this book on my shelf for quite some time and I hadn't touched it. I bought the book awhile back after seeing my neighbor who positively glowed with a healthy look. Really, she almost had a halo! So I asked her what she was doing to look so good and she told me she and her husband were on the Perricone Diet. I was very impressed. I bought the book, but I never put the diet to the test.

Then, recently my husband complained about a skin irritation. Visualize the light bulb over my head. I pulled the book out and we started the diet. At first I hadn't actually read the book. I just started the whole family out on the 28-day program. Then, by the second day of the diet, I was feeling so good that I was prompted to read about how this diet works.

The book is fairly straightforward, basic, and a little dry. Sometimes it reads like a text book due to the scientific names of various nutritional elements and to the descriptions processes like cell metabolism. But, it does a good job of explaining why this diet works to improve your skin and also helps you to lose weight.

Just from my brief experience with this diet, I'm a big fan of using it as a temporary detox. My general mood is up, some weight is dropping (too soon to tell how much) and my husband's dry skin is improving. The diet is pretty easy to follow. The foods are easy to prepare and the recipes result in pretty tasty fair.

Dr. Perricone seems to think it's a way of life, but I highly doubt that most people will want to avoid all breads, pastas, potatoes, and other high-glycemic carbohydrates for the rest of their lives. I've yet to meet anyone who could stay on a low-carb diet indefinitely. This diet is at least a healthy version. And, I'm sure few people will want to eat salmon six times a week forever. The last downside to the diet is that if you follow all of the recommendations from buying all organic to buying fresh fish, you might have to get a new job to support your new diet.

I will definitely add more fish and more low-glycemic carbohydrates into my diet following using this program. I'll save the strict regimen for periodic detoxification.

I rate the Perricone Prescription a 3 star book, but I recommend the diet highly!

French Women Don't Get Fat: The Secret of Eating for Pleasure - A Review

2006-08-21T09:42:00.000-07:00

"Abundance" is a popular term these days and learning to live a life of abundance is a popular subject. "French Women Don't Get Fat: The Secret of Eating For Pleasure" by Mireille Guiliano should be on the shelf of everyone who would like to include eating in their life of abundance without creating an abundant waistline. Guiliano has given us the secrets to eating well guilt free!

In the last two months and since beginning to read "French Women Don't Get Fat" I have lost 8 pounds and I have never felt a twinge of deprivation. In fact, I have had quite a few occasions of what I would consider sheer decadence in eating. Truthfully, I can't attribute all of that only to the principles of this book, but I have incorporated quite a few of the tips of the French Women in my quest for healthy eating and weight management and it most definitely has been a major factor.

The single most important thing to learn from this book is how to be satisfied when you eat. I won't give away the secrets to doing that here in this review. No, for that you'll have to read the book or wait for my upcoming blog entries inspired by the book. But, I will say that I have learned how to eat and to cook in a new way that is MORE satisfying than eating a bunch of "treats" and it has changed my world forever.

Another important benefit of this book is its recipes. I've tried quite a few of them and they are really wonderful. My favorite so far is the tomato salad with goat cheese. I've made this for company several times and even the best cooks that I know end up loving it and shyly asking what is in it. Everyone else but the tomato haters raved about it and finished every scrap. It's easy too.

I rate "French Women Don't Get Fat" by Mireille Guiliano a five star experience.

Refuse to Choose - A Review

2006-05-13T15:09:00.000-07:00

For those of us who continually struggle to figure out what we want to do when we grow up and who rarely or never finish projects, Barbara Sher’s book, Refuse to Choose is a MUST read. Why? Well, because as Sher will tell you, you are a Scanner. Knowing this will free your spirit and Sher will give you fun tools to use to do it!

I’m a self professed self-help junkie who can confess to feeling it’s often a drag to do exercises in a self improvement book. Sher’s exercises are actually fun. And, while I usually find most exercises that people write in self-help books minimally enlightening, a few of Sher’s are real eye openers. One such exercise was to create a list of all the things I’ve done so far in life. Wow, was that useful. Usually I think I haven’t done all that much, but once I listed it all on paper, my life took on new meaning. I discovered themes that I wouldn’t have without writing out this list. And, it was just plain old fun to think about all of it.

Another thing I liked quite a bit about Sher’s approach in this book is that she makes sure to keep it realistic. She tells us scanners that we shouldn’t try to finish every project that we start because we are built to explore many, many subjects. However, she tempers this with what I believe to be very sound advice. She tells us to pick something to finish. The sense of accomplishment we will get from finishing one or a few projects is well worth the effort.

The one criticism that I have is that I found it hard to read through each and every type of scanner about which Sher writes because they overlap enough to make me a little skeptical that each is really a true separate type. However, the “Life Models” that she has given for these types such as the “School Day Life Model” are phenomenal. They give people the right idea that they can live their lives in ways that uniquely suit them instead of wasting time trying to fit into the molds society gives them. For this reason and as a scanner myself, I call Sher a kindred spirit.

I rate Barbara Sher’s Refuse to choose a four star experience.

The World is a Waiting Lover - A Review

2006-04-18T15:30:00.000-07:00

I loved this book so much I had to wait a couple of weeks before I could finish it because I didn't want it to be over. If you've ever wondered where a crush could take you in your life, this is the book to read. Initially, it is a bit slow and the style of writing is more descriptive than I like, but it soon turns into a real page turner. One thing is for sure, if you're wondering why you're still getting crushes on people while you're already in a committed and happy relationship, this book will clear any issues you might have with that right up!

Trebbe Johnson shares with us her own experiences with desire and shows us what it means. She tells about how attractions to other people, especially when unrequited, are really calls or escorts to our own inner beloved. The call seems to be for the real person, but instead it leads her to follow and know the deepest part of herself, the part that allows her to express her most valuable passions. She writes that,

"The Escort to the Beloved is the person who by deserting us, eluding us, frustrating us, forcing us to face some truth we've been avoiding or some asset we've been trying to reject with misplaced humility, makes it possible for us to start living in a way we desparately need to and have been postponing all too long." (p. 108)

And she makes it plain to see just how we have a "habit of placing on the heads of others the crown of laurels -- or thorns -- we most need to wear ourselves..." And, "Because we want so badly to find and capitalize on our own vital, developing qualities yet sense that doing so is the work of a lifetime, we take what our heart tells us will be the easier route: we locate the missing link in somebody else and heap our passion there." (p.109)

Johnson did her homework with this book. It is filled with references to myth and psychology in a way that is not only appropriate to the material that she is writing about, but also that seriously educates the reader. She entices even those who aren't that interested in myth or psychology to know more! And for those who are interested, Johnson's Notes and Bibliography are worth their weight in gold.

I rate this book a five star experience!

Let's Keep the Baby - Part Two of the Review of A New Earth

2006-03-08T15:19:00.000-07:00

Now that we've reviewed the bath water of Eckhart Tolle's A New Earth, let's get to the baby, and this baby is beautiful, inspiring, and wise. As I mentioned in part one of my book review, my perspective on the ego, belief systems and moral relativism differs from what Tolle has spelled out. However, though I felt some of his views are potentially harmfully extreme, I still found this book utterly worthy of praise.

Why? It's simple. There is a great deal of profound wisdom in A New Earth. The wisdom contained in it is so uplifting that just the act of reading it will raise your spirit. And, if you live by some of Tolle's insights, you'll improve the quality of your life exponentially.

What I am struck by in A New Earth are the ideas that shift us from a false sense of ourselves to what's really in our hearts. Tolle wraps all that's not truly worthy of each of us into the term ego. Instead of ego, I'd prefer to call it, as I've heard it in another system called Human Design, the "not self". Tolle shows us that we've been living lives mostly guided by the conditioning of our families, our communities, and our cultural hertitage. This conditioning creates the not self. Certainly not all of that conditioning is bad. But, if we allow our lives to be run by views that we have never considered, never observed in own our behaviour, or never examined against the experiences produced by these views, we are most likely causing stress, unhappiness, numbness, or worse for ourselves and others around us.

Here are a few excerpts that I enjoyed.

"You do not become good by trying to be good, but by finding the goodness that is already within you, and allowing that goodness to emerge." (P. 13)

"Whenever tragic loss occurs, you either resist or you yield. Some people become bitter or deeply resentful; others become compassionate, wise, and loving. Yielding means inner acceptance of what is. You are open to life. Resistance is an inner contradiction, a hardening of the shell of the ego. You are closed. Whatever action you take in a state of inner resistance (which we could also call negativity) will create more outer resistance, and the universe will not be on your side; life will not be helpful. If the shutters are closed, the sunlight cannot come in. When you yield internally, when you surrender, a new dimension of consciousness opens up. If action is possible or necessary, your action will be in alignment with the whole and supported by creative intelligence, the unconditioned consciousness which in a state of inner openness you become one with. Circumstances and people then become helpful, cooperative. Coincidences happen. If no action is possible, you rest in the peace and inner stillness that come with surrender. You rest in God." (P. 58)

"You become most powerful in whatever you do if the action is performed for it's own sake rather than as a means to protect, enhance, or conform to you role identity." (P. 107)

It is worth mentioning the differences between Tolle's first book The Power of Now and A New Earth. The most striking difference is in the format the book is written. The Power of Now is in question and answer format and moves through material without as much direction as A New Earth does. The content itself is very similar. A couple of helpful pieces of new material also appear toward the end of A New Earth. One such new offering was on the power of enthusiasm. Tolle helps us see how to use our enthusiasm to become more creative and to enjoy life more deeply.

Based on the baby and the bath water, my rating for A New Earth is four stars. I do believe, however, that a great deal of people will find it to be more enjoyable than that.

Leggo my Ego - The Review Part One

2006-03-02T12:14:00.000-07:00

Caution: move slowly through this review and give the whole message a chance, especially if you are a die hard Eckhart Tolle fan. I am still a big fan, but this time, there is something amiss and I'm left feeling like I want to say "Leggo my Ego."

"A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose" is Eckhart Tolle's latest eye opening book and other probable hit on the best seller list. I found his latest book even more filled with great teaching and also, in some parts, quite a bit more difficult to accept than "The Power of Now".

While in the "Power of Now", I felt that Tolle's term ego was more self evidently limited to thoughts that arise out of the not always so helpful conditioning of our past, in "A New Earth" I sensed there might be a new level of meaning added to his use of "ego" that seems a bit over the top. Of course, this could be my ego running away with me, wink, wink, nudge, nudge. However, there are certain passages in Tolle's new book that had me wondering whether Tolle now is teaching some concepts that fly in the face of the beauty of this world. While I'm not sure that Tolle meant to be interpreted in this way and I can appreciate that his concepts could be as true as anything that I believe, this time around there are some feelings I have about some of what he is saying that I believe should not be too easily dismissed.

What am I talking about? I'm referring to Tolle's statement about the end of belief systems, his contradictory references to moral relativism, and how he curiously points to the lack of the existence of anything personal as the truth in what appears to be his confusion of Source with the self.

Okay, I'm found out. I happened to have gotten a degree in Social and Cultural Anthropology, so of course, when I read that "we are coming to the end not only of mythologies but also of ideologies and belief systems," (p. 21) my attention stood straight up. I can imagine a world without mythology, but personally (there I go again), I'd like to keep at least history of it so we can have something to do besides snore. Maybe I can go as far as imagining a life sans ideology at the macro level, but my heart starts to hurt when all of our beliefs go. Why? I say so because to me our beliefs are both the potential for all good as well as bad. Here sits our raison d'être in the seat of free will and of the purpose of duality itself. If there is nothing to believe, if all truth is known in the absolute, then there is no choice and furthermore, there is no more learning. Perhaps this is the goal, the Omega Point, I don't know, but something tells me that learning (requiring mistakes) is just as easily a part of the expansion of the Universe - eternally.

On the topic of relative and absolute truth Tolle has me logically baffled and also questioning the level of spiritual inspiration for parts of this new book. On the one hand, I fully understand the spirit behind the idea that a "right versus wrong" attitude is behind so much conflict and violence in the world. There is no doubt about that. But then Tolle goes on:

"...does that mean there is no such thing as right or wrong behavior, action, or belief? And wouldn't that be the moral relativism that some contemporary Christian teachings see as the great evil of our times? The history of Christianity is, of course, a prime example of how the belief that you are in sole possession of the truth, that is to say, right, can corrupt your actions and behavior to the point of insanity. For centuries, torturing and burning people alive if their opinion diverged even in the slightest from the Church doctrine or narrow interpretations of scripture (the "Truth") was considered right because the victims were 'wrong.'

... [a paragraph down the way]

The Catholic and other churches are actually correct when they identify relativism, the belief that there is no absolute truth to guide human behavior, as one of the evils of our times.... (p.69-70) .

[Much further into the book] "Does this mean that people are not responsible for what they do when possessed by the pain-body? My answer is: How can they be? How can you be responsible when you are unconscious? However, in the greater scheme of things, human beings are meant to evolve into conscious beings, and those who don't will suffer the consequences of their unconsciousness." (p.163).

Ah, the relative truth is just so hard to understand sometimes. And, Tolle verges on making a Boomeritis mistake. (Check out the boomer philosopher Ken Wilbur's book for the origins of the term Boomeritis. Wilbur makes a darn good argument that relativism leads to extremely egoistic, even narcissistic behavior). Tolle's mistake is that he doesn't make it clear that at the level in which we live, accountability is a must, but that on the level consciousness of the Divine, accountability for the unconscious mistake makes no sense and is not in keeping with Divine Mercy. I think Einstein had a handle on it when he said "No problem can be solved from the level of consciousness from which it was created." However, that doesn't mean we should or even can skip all the way to the absolute level. Wouldn't it defeat the purpose of having experiences in time if we could just skip it and Be God? It's all for the greater good.

Yes, in my belief system we must hold each other accountable for our actions even though we do not have the benefit of the perspective of the absolute. We obviously do not do a good job of holding each other accountable and the current use of the death penalty among so many other brutal practices point to this. So, let's improve, but please, I don't want the Hells Angels to be security guards at the next concert that I attend and I'm really feeling weak kneed at the idea of my child's next school teacher being a redeemed child molester.

Next let's take a look at some of what Tolle says about all things personal and what seems to be a confusion of Source with oneself. He writes on page 57, "you realize that your true identity in consciouness itself. ... The ultimate truth of who you are is ... I Am." While I seek to become one with I Am, I do not believe that I Am (God Himself/Herself). Instead I believe that I am OF God I Am and that I am truly one with I Am in eternity similarly to the way that my finger is a part of my body in the world of the finite. I also believe that my personality and my experiences are a gift forevermore if I so choose. I am not simply a total illusion whose reality is only that of an impersonal and neutral God who is using my eyes and personality filter to experience a unique view. Existence is existence. It is not a television show with virtual experiential capabilities and simultaneous observation capability - God as actor and as spectator, while the actor's consciousness apart from being God is an illusion. Whew. That Seems like a cruel joke if it is true.

Perhaps it is easier to think of the Universe impersonal because our minds have so much trouble imagining the infinite number of unique personalities. But, in my experience, and this is probably only really understandable at an experiential level, God is both impersonal and very, very personal. And, all of the celestial and mortal beings who live in this Universe are undoubtedly personal and uniquely individual.

Maybe it’s just easier to overcome our negative and imbalanced egos and become balanced and forgiving human beings by depersonalizing our viewpoints. However, it seems to me that the concept of each of us being the impersonal God I Am tips the scale of balance over to the other side with too much weight being added. On this point and without fear of being judged as egoistic, I'll stand by my personality as the essence that I recognize as myself through the window of my eyes when I look in the mirror. Though my body will perish, the unique essence of my soul, the snowflake that I am in the blanket of snow that is I Am will live on. That is God's gift to me and the gift that I have in common with each of my fellows.

Stay tuned for part two - the rest of the review and the reason why in spite of part one of my review, "A New Earth" is definitely still a great book and a keeper.

A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose - An Overview

2006-02-09T09:06:00.000-07:00

Eckhart Tolle's "A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose" covers material from and goes deeper than his first book, the best selling "Power of Now." In this book Tolle is even more definitive about his use of the term ego. He provides the reader with a similar but expanded explanation of how the ego operates and then goes on to describe how to free oneself from the ego's circular path through presence. True to his new title, Tolle shows us how the process of becoming aware and awakening to our own individual presence will create a new consciousness on earth.

Warrior of the Light - The Review - Rating 4 Stars

2006-01-26T15:17:00.000-07:00

The Warrior of the Light is another great book and an easy delightful read by Paulo Coelho. It's full of wise insights and just as the jacket suggests, it is a companion to The Alchemist. It expounds upon the lessons and answers a few questions that might arise while reading The Alchemist.

Here's a passage from the book that relates to my life at the moment as I embark on a new or renewed commitment to meditate daily:

The Warrior of the Light meditates. He sits in a quiet place in his tent and surrenders himself to the divine light. When he does this, he tries not to think about anything; he shuts himself off from the search for pleasure, from challenges and revelations, and allows his gifts and powers to reveal themselves.

Even if he does not recognize them then, these gifts and powers will take care of his life and will influence his day-to-day existence.

While he meditates, the Warrior is not himself, but a spark from the Soul of the World. Meditation gives him an understanding of his responsibilities and of how he should behave accordingly.

A Warrior of the Light knows that in the silence of his heart he will hear an order that will guide him.

And there you are, one of many power packed pages from the Warrior of the Light. I've read that passage at least three times and still I saw something new in it each time I read it.

The parts I bolded particularly resonate with my experience and my itentions in having a practice of meditation. In meditation, one surrenders oneself to being one with all of life. One can recognizes one's part within the oneness. In being one with all of life, one is in union with the Soul of the World and has access to all things past, present, and future. And, finally and perhaps most importantly, one has the ability to connect with true guidance from God. (One, One, One - now I can see why Coelho chose the "Warrior of the Light" as it is so much more pleasant and flowing than "One!")

While I found the wisdom in the book to be very useful and very important, I've rated this book a bit lower than The Alchemist, because it wasn't quite as masterful in using a story to illustrate it's points. It's obvious that Coelho's intention was not to create a story such as in the Alchemist, but I found the lack of story a bit disappointing. I rate The Warrior of the Light at 4 Stars.

Warrior of the Light - An Overview

2005-12-20T21:19:00.000-07:00

Paulo Coelho's Warrior of the Light is a set of wisdom by which to live. There is tiny bit of a story to set the stage and to wrap up the wisdom contained in the book. The boy grows to a man in the prologue and returns to the beach where he learned about meditation and stillness to be urged to write the manual of the warrior.

On each page of the manual is a short piece of wisdom stated from the point of view of a warrior. The warrior character is a metaphorical martial artist and he is both a hero and very human.

Viktor Frankl - Following Your Heart

2005-12-19T08:56:00.000-07:00

Do you know of Viktor Frankl, the famous author, psychoanalyst, and concentration camp survivor? His story (history!) is amazing and truly inspiring. Here is a Viktor Frankl quote that reminds us again of why it is so important to follow one's heart:

"Again and again I therefore admonish my students in Europe and America: Don't aim at success - the more you aim at it and make it a target, the more you are going to miss it. For success, like happiness, cannot be pursued; it must ensue, and it only does so as the unintended side effect of one's personal dedication to a cause greater than oneself or as the by-product of one's surrender to a person other than oneself. Happiness must happen, and the same holds for success: you have to let it happen by not caring about it. I want you to listen to what your conscience commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long-run - in the long-run, I say! - success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think about it."

From this quote we can derive a recipe for a great life:

A heap of listening to your heart,
A dash of courage to carry out your heart's desire,
And, a few pinches of patience while you play out your life.

Read another follow your heart inspiration.
Learn how to distinguish your heart from your head.
Read more about following your heart.

Follow Your Heart; It’s Not in Your Head!

2005-12-13T12:27:00.000-07:00

Inspired by:

Read my review

"Head, heart, everything I think happens in my brain, right?" Well, yes, but everything you feel happens in your body and that's where the heart is. At the end of this article there are a couple of exercises designed to teach you the difference between what arises from your mind and what arises from your “heart.” I enclose “heart” in quotes because the experience of each person as to the truth of what is right for them is a matter of the heart, but the experience of how and where in the body that is felt is different for different people. We all have the ability to feel things in the same way. However, where in the body that the knowing feeling occurs and how it feels is consistent and reliable differently depending on the individual.

Many people will feel a juicy feeling in the gut that says, “Oh yeah, uh huh, that’s right for me,” or, “Nope, no way.” Some will feel a sensation all over their body, something like the chills that either says, “Yes, this is the truth,” or “No, this is the wrong way.” And there are many variations of the way this feels for people.

No matter how we each personally feel the truth in our bodies, the information that tells us that we are on the right track or the wrong track doesn’t come from our minds. This information comes from our bodies and then arrives in our minds. It’s in the processing centers of the mind where this information gets translated into words that we are able to communicate with others or that allows us to take appropriate action.

So just how do you tell the difference between what emanates from the mind and what comes from the body? Have you ever had the experience of trying to accomplish something, say trying to solve a problem in your job and you get stuck? Have you gotten to the point where you’ve sat around for hours trying to think of an idea to solve the problem and everything you think of just doesn’t work? Then, you decide to take a walk to the bathroom and you are focusing on washing your hands when, bang! You’ve got the answer. Or, your in the shower that evening and boom! The light bulb goes on and you know exactly what to do to finish the task.

That’s the difference between what originates from the body and what is created by the mind. Things that originate from the mind are left-brain activities that are logical and linear in nature. This kind of thought comes in very handy when you are calculating the lunch bill total or folding a piece of paper into fours sections, but it’s not so helpful to use as the main way of determining your life path.

How many of us have had the experience where we had a big decision to make, like whether to go to medical school or pursue a passion in biology or race cars at Indianapolis? How many of us have been torn between what seems like the right thing to do and what we really want to do? The mind tells us, go to medical school. For some of us the mind and the body would be in concert here and these are the true doctors in our world. But, for many of us this question can become a mind game of “shoulds.” “Well, I should go to med school because if I become a doctor I’ll be able to help people and make great money.” Or, “I should go to medical school because my parents will be proud of me and I can attract the right kind of spouse being a doctor.”

But, if the person who is thinking this way checks in with his or her body, the body’s answer may be very different. The body might say nothing, or it might say “hmmm, not likely.” If we follow the mind here our energy begins to become depleted. We can sustain a career that isn’t right for us, but it’s a struggle and the pay off that we once rationalized seems like a bum deal. (See what Steve Jobs of Apple has to say to Stanford Grads about following his heart.)

So what if you’ve played the mind game for awhile and you want to know what you really want but you don’t remember what that is and you don’t know how to find out. Well here are a couple of exercises to get you back on the path of listening to your heart so you can follow it on to the adventures that suit you best.

Let’s start with the mind. Do the following puzzle to get your mind revved up and test your logic ability.

There are three people sitting in a row in an airport a woman, a young man, and an old man. Each has a different hat, newspaper, and a different color carry-on bag. Use the following information to find out who is reading the New York Times.

The woman is wearing a Pittsburg Steelers hat.
The old man wearing a beret with a brown bag is sitting next to the woman who is on his right.
The other man is reading USA Today.
The person wearing the New York Yankees hat has a black bag
The person reading the Washington Post is directly to the left of the person with a green bag.
The person with a green bag is sitting next to the person with a black bag and the black bag belongs to the person on the far right.

(To see the answer scroll down to the bottom of this post)

How did you arrive at the answer? Did you use your body at all to find it? Did you feel anything while you were trying to figure out the answer? Was the experience of solving the problem fun? Was it frustrating? Was it meaningful? What made you take the test? Please comment on this at the end of this post if you would (click on the word comments at the bottom of this post to leave a comment).

Okay, now on to the body. Do the following exercise to see how your body tells you what works for you and what doesn’t. Read through first then try it. Try it a few times using different people or situations.

Close your eyes and take three deep breaths. Then take a minute to remember something you love to do or someone you care very much about.

Now, check in with your body. Take note of where in your body you feel something. How does that feel? Then open your eyes.

Are you able to tell the difference between what answers you arrive at in the mind and what answers come from the body? What’s the difference between the objectives in these two exercises? Did one or the other seem more fun for you? In what situations would you use the skills you used in the first exercise? In what situations would you use the skills in the second exercise?

I hope you had fun on our journey through the head and the heart. Leave comments about your experience here (click on comments below).

You can find more information about the importance of the heart at Heart Math. Check out my coaching website to contact me for a free coaching session and get coached in following your heart’s path.

Answer to the test above: The woman is reading the NY Times.

An Inspiration to Follow Your Heart.

2005-12-13T08:46:00.000-07:00

In researching a little further into the lesson of following your heart, I found a fantastic commencement speech by Steve Jobs. He spoke to Stanford Grads last summer and the speech is an inspiration for following your heart. Take a look. It's clear that there is no recipe for what to do to become successful doing what you love other than to follow your heart wherever it takes you. It's also clear that time is a great deciever and what looks like a great big failure from one point in time can actually be nothing more than a temporary bridge to more success.

'You've got to find what you love,' Jobs says

The Alchemist: A Fable About Following Your Dream - A Lesson: Listen to Your Heart

2005-12-06T17:29:00.000-07:00

The words that most struck me when I read The Alchemist were, "listen to your heart." These words stuck out on the page so much that if I didn't know better, I'd have thought that the words had been printed in bold.

This is one of many lessons in the book and the lesson I am writing about here. We don't hear words like this too often these days, but interestingly enough I had heard them the very same week that I picked up The Alchemist. I heard them from a dear person in my life who was learning that very same lesson that week. Knowing that the Universe sends messages to me all of the time, sometimes even through Dr. Phil ;), the second time I came across these words, I practically sat bolt upright.

Here's what struck me in the book. This is a conversation between the book's main character Santiago and the Alchemist. The boy Santiago starts out by asking the Alchemist, "'why should I listen to my heart?'

'Because you will never again be able to keep it quiet. Even if you pretend not to have heard what it tells you, it will always be there inside of you, repeating to you what you're thinking about life and about the world.'

'You mean I should listen, even if it's treasonous?'

'Treason is a blow that comes unexpectedly. If you know your heart well, it will never be able to do that to you. Because you'll know its dreams and wishes, and will know how to deal with them.'

'You will never be able to escape from your heart. So it's better to listen to what it has to say. That way, you'll never have to fear an unanticipated blow.'
The boy continued to listen to his heart as they crossed the desert. He came to understand its dodges and tricks, and to accept it as it was. He lost his fear, and forgot about his need to go back to the oasis, because, one afternoon his heart told him it was happy. "

Here we have it. The best reason to listen to your heart is because, it will drive you nuts if you don't and you will suffer without learning to do this. Could this be one of the leading causes of heart attacks? I don't know, but I suspect it may be true.

Many of us don't remember how to listen because we are so habituated to listening to our thoughts. We have a hard time distinguishing between the two. I'll be posting an exercise about this in the next few days. Please check back to try it out.

If you are skeptical about the truth of your hearts ability to speak to you, I have a very good and quite amazing article to share with you that will help you realize how powerful the memory of the heart is and how very separate it is from the thoughts generated by the brain. Take a gander at the article linked here below in which the following is written:

"There is the 8-year-old girl who got the heart of a 10-year-old murder victim, according to medical reports. Plagued by nightmares of the crime after her transplant, the girl used the images in her dreams to help locate and convict her donor's killer. "

Some heart recipients report strange changes
Say they sense traits, tastes of organ donors
By Carla McClain
ARIZONA DAILY STAR
Tucson, Arizona Published: 02.27.2005

The Alchemist: A Fable About Following Your Dream - The Review - Rating 5 Stars

2005-12-06T15:00:00.000-07:00

The Alchemist is an easy read and contains as much wisdom as books that are ten times it's size. It can only have been inspired work and like all inspired works, it is inspiring. Let me repeat what I said in the overview - it's simple, profound and chuck full of meaning.

The story is pleasant and flows quickly and naturally. As I read it, I had moments that in the coaching world we like to call "a-ha" moments. These weren't intellectual moments, but rather experiential moments. Each time the "a-ha" came it was like a cord was struck within me. These cords were singing recognitions of the truth to a place deep within me.

Before you roll your eyeballs and head for the nearest information highway on ramp, give me a chance to explain. This is not just feel good stuff; it's a parable of life and living well. If you are looking for something in your life, and I mean anything, this book will inspire you to find it. It will make you understand that if you want to live a great life that you can do that by following your dreams. And, if you think you don't have a dream, The Alchemist will show you that you've only forgotten it.

Let me give you an example of the brilliance of this book. It even contains a metaphor for what's great about the book. Chase your tail on that one! Remember that commercial about the Sistine Chapel on the head of a pin? Let me expound upon this.

Santiago, the book's main character says, "I learned that the world has a soul, and that whoever understands that soul can also understand the language of things. I learned that many alchemists realized their Personal Legends, and wound up discovering the Soul of the World, the Philosopher’s Stone and the Elixir of Life."

He goes on to say that "above all, I learned that all of these things are so simple that they could be written on the surface of an emerald." (Page 83)

It turns out that what is written on the Emerald Tablet is a picture or a code. And, the code "can't be understood by reason alone," says the Alchemist to Santiago later in the book. (Page 127) He goes on to point out that it can be understood by immersing yourself in the world, within your current environment or within any environment you wish. Everything in the world can teach you about the meaning of life.

The metaphor for this book is the Emerald Tablet. The Alchemist is the Emerald Tablet. It helps you get in touch with your experience of life by identification. It keeps you from living too much in your head or in the world of thinking about life. It puts you smack dab into getting out there to exerience life. It's simple message is live life to it's fullest in pursuit of what's most important to you and to you only and in doing so you will be contributing your part to the whole of humanity.

I rate this book a 5 of 5 Stars.

The Alchemist: A Fable About Following Your Dream - A Brief Overview

2005-12-06T07:47:00.000-07:00

Simple, profound, and filled with lessons would describe my experience with The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. This book is a classic work of fiction and apparently the world thinks so too as it's sold over twenty million copies and has been translated into fifty-six languages.

Coelho weaves a story about a boy, Santiago, who sets out in search of a treasure. The treasure he is to find is what Coelho calls a Personal Legend. Everyone has one, he says, but not everyone finds the courage to go after it. Coelho's hero, Santiago finds this bravery within himself.

Santiago is a shepherd who is urged by the King of Salem, Melchizedek to set out on a journey that takes him from his home in Spain across the Strait of Gibraltar to Africa, through the Saharan desert to the Egyptian Pyramids. On his way he runs into challenges that would send most people packing. Each of the challenges he faces has a lesson for him to learn. It's curiously like real life in that Santiago usually thinks one thing about his current predicament only to find out through the lesson that it's not what he thinks.

Due to Santiago's choice to be flexible in his thought and to believe in Omens (signs that the Universe is conspiring to help him), Santiago learns that the course of life is happiest when one is pursuing one's dream. He learns that when a person is open to the journey of following his/her dream, the process of finding the dream and living it out is the ultimate fulfillment in life.

More: Read My Review of The Alchemist